Reclaiming Your Greatest Self

I spent the entire weekend painting a portrait of Inanna, Sumerian Queen of Heaven and Earth. I love Inanna’s story, not only because it is one of the first recorded stories in all of human history, but because it is the story of a brave woman who ventures into the underworld, the realm of the shadow, to retrieve her Greatest Self.

Braving the Underworld

When pursuing self-employment or meaningful lifework, the underworld represents our growing edge. Essentially, it’s the storehouse of our unclaimed brilliance.

For instance, some people use this place to bury their divine callings, like a call to ministry, because it doesn’t fit in with their sense of self.

Others bury ideas for tangible things like a website because it represents being visible in the world and that feels vulnerable. In this case, though, it isn’t really the website that lies buried, but the confidence needed to share their gifts with the world.

In order to grow as people, however, we need to journey into the darkness and retrieve our hidden treasures; these are the aspects of our Self that will satisfy our soul.

So the big question is: how do you willingly go into the underworld and retrieve the things you have intentionally or unintentionally denied?

With a lot of help, courage and preparation.

Answering the Call

While in her holy garden, Inanna hears a call from the great below. Her sister Ereshkigal, Queen of the Underworld, dwells in this place and Inanna is being invited to visit.

But this is a tricky journey, for when you enter the underworld you never return. (This is symbolic of the old self dying so the new Self can be reborn.)

In Diane Wolkstein’s rendition of “Inanna’s Descent” it is said that, “Inanna abandoned heaven and earth to descend to the underworld.”

Indeed, this is what it’s like to embrace our greater Self. We must let go of our current attachments in order to grow more fully into our potential.

The first step is to answer the call. Using the example above, this may be a call to ministry or even a call to be more visible in the world. Regardless, this call can conjure up fear: fear of failure, of (metaphoric) death, of ridicule, of the unknown, of imagined demons lurking in the dark places.

Exercise:

Get out a piece of paper and answer the following question:

What are you being called to create right now?

Think of three callings you’ve been reluctant to pursue. This could be a thing, like having a website, or something less tangible, like following a call to ministry.

The first step on this journey is to consciously choose to answer the call lest the choice be made for you (you don’t want this to happen…it usually involves illness or a disintegration of your current lifestyle…).

The second step is to build a support group, because even though you alone will make this journey having help is essential.

Preparing for the Descent

Before her journey begins, Inanna petitions her three grandfathers for help, asking each to come to her rescue should she not return.

After the first two deny her request, her grandfather Enki, God of Wisdom, agrees to offer his services should Inanna need his help.

With aid secured, Inanna prepares for her long journey.

Who will help you?

Enki is the God of Wisdom. He knows how to help Inanna make a successful ascent from the underworld, most likely because he has been there before. He has experience where she does not.

Exercise:

Review the three things on your list. Who can help you achieve each goal?

Hint: this person must be wiser and more experienced than you in this particular field or challenge. Not all people are qualified to help you, even if they love you and want to see you succeed.

Also, have no fear if someone denies your request for help. Someone else will be available for you. Keep asking until you find the right helper.

Fill your page with potential helpers so you have it on hand when you need it.

Relinquishing Your Identity

Before she begins her journey, Inanna dons seven symbols of her royal status, called the “Me.” They are a crown, jewels, a robe, staff, breast plate, gold ring and eye ointment. After she’s decked out in all her glory, Inanna instructs her maidservant, Ninshubar, to fetch Enki if Inanna does not return in three days.

Like Inanna, it’s easy to become attached to our material status, our sense of self. But as Inanna is about to discover, we cannot rely on these things when faced with what truly matters. Jewels and eye ointment are useless weapons in the underworld. They may charm our admirers, but they will never sway the depths of our soul.

In fact, Inanna can’t even take her Me with her on this particular journey. When she arrives at the gate to the underworld she is greeted by the gatekeeper. He tells her she must remove her seven Me before she can visit Ereshkigal.

Inanna relinquishes everything. She descends to the underworld, her soul and body bare, and stands vulnerable before her sister, the Queen.

Answering the call is like this. It leaves us feeling exposed, even if only for a brief moment. But we must relinquish our notion of self, with a lower case “s” if we are to embrace our true Self.

Exercise:

Remember the three items you listed above? If you are not taking action with them answer the following questions:

What’s the worst thing that could happen if you did these things?

How might you prevent this from happening?

How might you prepare so you can succeed?

Embracing the Shadow: Death of the Former Self

When Inanna completes her task she bids her sister farewell and prepares to return to earth. Ereshkigal, though, tells Inanna she cannot leave. Instead, Inanna is turned into a hunk of rotting flesh and quickly hung on a hook.

Now Inanna is powerless. She has no choice but to submit.

There is a period in our pursuit of the greater Self when we feel less than whole, less than brilliant. That’s because our former self is disintegrating and we have not yet become our new Self.

This can be a lonely place because we alone can make this journey.

Exercise:

How do you handle the dark places in life? Does this method work for you?

If not, is there another way to move through the darkness?

What actions do you embrace during the light periods that may help you through the dark periods? (Like having a coach, spiritual practice, or getting exercise, etc.)

If you have nothing, put something in place immediately.

“If you don’t invite God to be your summer Guest, He won’t come in the winter of your life.” From Autobiography of a Yogi

Resurrection of the New Self

The only thing Inanna can do now is surrender to her experience. There she hangs for three days and three nights until Enki sends his help.

And what does he send? Two flies, one carrying bread, the other water, to help feed Inanna and bring her back to life. This is the Holy Communion, one that symbolizes becoming one with God’s love and wisdom.

In surrendering to our Divine Self by imbibing the Holy Communion, we are born anew. This could be symbolic of surrendering to God. But it could also be symbolic of turning out dark shadows into our bright shadows, or our fears into our strengths.

Inanna is now free to ascend to the light of the world; to resume her place as Queen of Heaven and Earth. She returns a wiser woman, more experienced and with a greater sense of purpose.

Exercise:

Are you willing to ask for help, Divine or otherwise?

When help comes, do you recognize it? Do you embrace the help that is offered you?

Summary

Rarely do we know what lies hidden in the underworld. The only way to find out is to go there. But the truth of the underworld is that no one returns the same.

In the descent, though, lies an incredible opportunity to experience our Divine Self, an aspect of our Soul we would not experience without a journey into the land of the shadow.

What greatest lies waiting for you? Are you brave enough to find out?